Three Sips of Sake

I am only an occasional reader of White Crane [although I anticipate I'll become an addict very soon! Such good writing.] I'm a buddy of Jim Asal who directed me to your website because of his contribution to the Marriage Issue.

I much enjoyed the description of the commitment(?) ceremony you attended ["A Modern Union Rite" WC#61].

I appreciated the detail and thought and love and energy that went into the fellows' service. I would have been a delighted guest and participant if I had known the two men.

Our situation was so totally different. We were both in our late 50's in 1998. I'm a Theravada Buddhist of 40+ years. My Partner Alan has no religious feeling of any sort and considers himself non-spiritual. Since Buddhism recognizes no religious aspect of marriage, I was indifferent on that score, too.

We had met at a Leather S&M party. We dated for a full year within the Leather Community. We wanted to invite our friends to participate in the joy we had found in each other, so what to do? Cocktails, of course.

We took over the back room of a local Gay restaurant, set up lots of food and an open bar, and after folks had gathered, we exchanged three sips of sake from the same cup, a' la Shinto, and declared ourselves a Couple before our friends. A wonderful round of clapping ensued, balloons, confetti ... and everyone got back to their drinks. Simple, yes?

Effective, apparently. This will be our 7th anniversary in October. We always invite a few friends over, exchange small gifts, and before our assembled buddies renew ourselves with three sips of sake from the same cup.

I'm sending you wishes for peace and joy and happiness in your life.

PATRICK HAMILTON
Washington, DC

An Expression of Joy and Beauty

Hey Dan and Bo...

Once again I am glad to have had the honor of reading still another fine issue of White Crane. My most pleasurable moment was in viewing the colorful eye catching cover! Kudos! The colors are wonderful, the art work fantastic and the overall appeal delicious!

While I do see White Crane as being a very serious forum, I also enjoy seeing it as an expression of joy and beauty. And certainly this new cover design should attract a few new readers from sales in bookstores.

Overall this issue presented some very in depth perspectives on love and relationships as well as the manipulative actions of both church and state. I am impressed by the breadth of insight that several of your contributors had on this subject.

In the end the most important message that I received was that mutual respect for all peoples and their relationship choices should be honored and protected. Thank you for your part in furthering this concept!

GREG KASPAREK
Iola, Wisconsin