Editor's Note "To Have & To Hold"

Dan Vera

If you picked up this issue at your local bookstore, you'd be forgiven for thinking we were jumping on the gay marriage bandwagon. You'd be forgiven and you'd be wrong. We actually decide on topics a year in advance. This way we can nurture a "call for submissions" and begin to imagine the conversation the issue would unfold. Of course a year ago we had no idea that "gay marriage" would be so current or capture the imagination (and fears) of the country.

In his recent book, Gay Marriage: Why It Is Good for Gays, Good for Straights, and Good for America, Jonathan Rauch argues that the recent court decisions and the myriad acts of civil disobedience have resulted in the "imagination gap" around gay marriage snapping shut. The very idea of "gay marriage," once so foreign a concept in our society, and even in our community, has achieved a moral valence as the images of gay couples demanding marriage have flooded the media.

At the Gay Spirit Culture summit in May, I found myself expressing one of the great burdens of being in a tribe that is always receiving new amnesiac members — we must always be retelling the stories of our existence. It has always been thus. Of course the minute the statement left my mouth I had to add that one of our great opportunities lies in this same responsibility to tell the story, in our inherent ability to retell the stories. Indeed, because we do not have the luxury of traditions and conventions, we are constantly rediscovering and reinventing ourselves as gay people.

In this same way perhaps we hold the ability to discover and reinvent the possibilities, indeed the very nature of marriage.

Having James Asal's work on our cover is a personal delight. I have been a long time admirer of Asal's weekly online comic strip Adam and Andy. Asal has such an uncanny knack of capturing the sublime joys in the diurnal exploits of his characters, a loving gay couple, that my partner and I have often shaken our heads and wondered if he has us under surveillance. His wonderful contribution to our cover sweetly captures what is at the core of the move for gay marriage — the simple honoring of our relationships.

But the issue also has its complexity. No one knows this more than Evan Wolfson, whose name will go down as the central figure whose work helped snap that "imagination gap" shut. He was calling for same sex marriage rights years before the idea or our comprehension of its possibility existed. What will become of this movement? How big will the backlash be? Time and our efforts in the struggle will tell, but we will forever be changed nonetheless. We are honored to publish his timely reflection on the bread and butter realities behind the move for marriage.

As we go to press, President Bush has addressed the Southern Baptist Convention asking for its support for passage of his anti-gay Federal Marriage Amendment. The convention readily passed a resolution calling for passage of the FMA (along with a resolution calling public schools "godless.") This action comes from the largest Protestant denomination in the United States. How does one respond to such hatemongering and philistinism? Well, Eric "Fritter" Riley offers a delightful "counter curse" to the Federal Marriage Amendment that deserves closer inspection. The important thing is to understand how the issue of "gay marriage" is being catapulted and capitalized.

We are proud that we often have the opportunity to publish what others are too pusillanimus and craven to print. When longtime contributor Daniel Helminiak harnessed his outrage at the Catholic Church's position on gay marriage to a reasoned analysis it resulted in a penetrating essay on the Church's flawed understanding of human sexuality. The piece was turned down by various Catholic publications. We are honored to include his insightful analysis in these pages.

We are also mindful that gay marriage is not a new thing. That is, the honoring of same sex love relationships has been with us for a very long time. Many of our readers may remember the firestorm of controversy that met the publication of centuries-old Catholic same sex marriage rites. John Boswell had uncovered them in the church's archives and the Vatican wasted no time refuting what was clearly self-evident — that once upon a time same sex couples married and their church found a way to honor these relationships. In this issue we republish the lovely Adelphopoiia Rite that is believed to date to the fourth century Eastern Orthodox church. In the ritual the betrothed are granted "a love unfeigned." The archway featured on that page comes from the interior of a Turkish monastery dedicated to same sex martyrs Sts. Sergius and Bacchus who are mentioned in the Adelphopoiia Rite.

That monastery is now an Islamic madrasa. We can only hope that the teachings there are of the spirit found in the work of Islamic scholar Sheik Daayiee Abdullah who brings the poetic imagery of "comfort and cloak" to the discussion of gay marriage. We are honored by his presence in our pages.

Have we mentioned enough in this space how happy we are to have Andrew Ramer's regular contributions to White Crane? When Bo and I first thought of having Andrew write a regular column we imagined a practical e-motional piece at the end of each issue that would take us out of mind and into some movement based on the teachings of the issue. Andrew accomplishes this task marvelously. I had a chance to finally meet Andrew at the aforementioned summit. I must confess to a fear upon meeting a writer whose work chimes for me — that he could be diametrically unlike his writing. It happens. But not Andrew. I experienced him to embody what Natalie Goldberg writes about "living one's art in one's daily life." Andrew is Rumi writing for Shams the beloved. His contribution to this issue provides a fitting grace note with a ritual to the divine beloved that we all, partnered or not, can celebrate.

We've been on a run of milestones the past year. The Winter issue marked Toby Johnson's transition to Contributing Editor, the Spring issue marked the first publication under Bo Young as Editorial Director this issue finds us reaching the auspicious milestone of fifteen years as a publication. In that first issue Bob Barzan wrote that, "the call of the authentic self demands to be heard and acted upon and we risk great damage to our psychological and spiritual health if we ignore it." In all of our work we aim to provide tools to help in that movement towards the authentic life. How lovely to have contributions in this issue from White Crane's editorial past and present with reviews by Bob, Toby and Bo.

Lastly, after working somewhat behind the scenes on the last few issues, this issue marks my first foray into editing a complete issue. This has become such a collaborative process between Bo in Brooklyn and me in Brookland (my neighborhood in Washington, DC) that such distinctions basically come down to who will write the column you are reading now. In any case, I want to take this opportunity to thank Bo for this continued friendship and inspiring partnership.

So here's the Marriage issue. Bo and I have had and held it for a year now.

You have it and hold it now. Enjoy.


Dan Vera
Washington, DC 2004
Also from this issue...
#61 Marriage
  • Two Same-Sex Rites: Ancient and Modern Adelphopoiia Rite,  
  • Many Meanings of Marriage,  
  • Comfort and Cloak, Sheik Daayiee Abdullah
  • Grace Builds On Nature, Daniel A. Helminiak
  • Is Same-Sex Love A Gift From God?, Timothy J. Leary
  • The Sanctity of Marriage, W. King Mott
  • The Federal Amendment Countercurse, Eric "Fritter" Riley
  • Editor's Note (Gay Marriage), Dan Vera
  • A Modern Rite (Same Sex Marriage Rite), Dan Vera
  • For Richer, For Poorer: Same-Sex Couples and the Freedom to Marry, Evan Wolfson
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